Iron Man's Cold-Weather Armor is Officially His Dumbest Ever

Marvel's Iron Man has created dozens of armors in his long career as a superhero and an Avenger, but a certain cold-weather armor is arguably his most useless yet. Tony Stark is an inventor who never rests on his laurels; this often results in wildly different armors specially-built for certain occasions. The new designs help Stark fight new villains (and help toy manufacturers restock shelves with merchandise depicting whatever armor happens to be on current covers), but Iron Man #318 debuts an armor so ineffectual and useless that it was quickly forgotten.

Iron Man seemingly updates and radically redesigns his armor every few issues. Even his first all-grey armor was quickly discarded in favor of a gold-plated suit (which debuted in The Avengers #1). His more familiar red-gold suit wouldn't appear until Tales of Suspense #48, and has become the gold standard color scheme for Iron Man suits going forward. Occasionally Stark deviates from this classic look, such as his Silver Centurion armor, War Machine armor, and his rather inane "cold weather" suit.

Related: Iron Man Just Proved The World Would Be Better if He Wasn't A Hero

Iron Man spends the bulk of the issue in a one-on-one battle with Ted Slaght, a professor and former mentor. The two were friends once, but after he was caught in a freak lab accident, Ted Slaght became the villain Slag. After fighting in a graveyard and reluctantly destroying the creature who was once his friend, Tony Stark constructs a brand-new suit of armor suited for the cold (ostensibly so; the armor's capabilities can only be inferred as no information beyond the visual is given to the reader). He uses his new suit to fly to his cavernous Hall of Armors...and that's it. No other capabilities can be seen.

Considering the fact that Stark updates his armor continually, one wonders why the genius billionaire playboy philanthropist waited until the 90s to install a heater in his armor. If Iron Man routinely flies next to jet airliners (and he does), his suit should already be adapted to cold temperatures, considering the cruising altitude of a 747 is roughly 35,000 feet, at which the temperature is around minus-65 Fahrenheit (or minus-54 Celsius). Thus, this armor provides an alternative paint job and little else.

The Arctic Amor (so named in official Marvel sources) rarely made an appearance outside of the issue; perhaps writers realized the brand recognition of a red-and-gold suit trumps cold-weather camouflage. Iron Man's recent Iron God armor, an all-silver affair with occasional purple exhaust, is the latest non-standard suit to emerge from Stark's armory, though it's almost certainly temporary. Iron Man will soon be back in his red and gold armor, and all other odd variants - such as his cold weather suit - will be left behind.

Next: War Machine Was Always The Better Iron Man, And Ever Marvel Knows It

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